Journalists in Muscat

My loyal and valued readers.

I have been perusing those bastions of the free-press "The Week" and "Y!" magazine over the past fortnight, and while the sensational scoops contained within are of incontrovertible benefit to this ginormous conurbation, I wanted to particularly laud the indubitably staggering thesaurus skills of our sub-continental newshounds. 

That is why, without further ado, I am naming Saturday, 29th of October "International Write Like An Indian Journalist Day".

So let's waylay our readers with a plethora of Webster-sourced vocabulary. Who knows, maybe we will uncover a glut of penmen to further add to the existing hoard of wordsmiths downtown.

JD

Update: Omantel Unblocks Community Queer Blog

In the light of what I assume were numerous requests and protests from the blogging community, Omantel have unblocked gay community website "Community Queer".

Well done Omantel and the TRA. In this blogger's opinion, you have made a very brave and very important, intelligent decision.

Congratulations!

JD

Begging Scam

Imagine my surprise when I read a comment on Suburban's blog recently. I am not the best at putting links into my blogs so you'll have to make do with me copying and pasting Boxster's comments:

"a well dressed man (clean and ironed dishdasha, designer shades) with great english skills stopped by today, apologized profusely, tried to explain that he was a neighbor, locked himself out, his brother is driving from the interior with the spare keys, his father had a stroke a few hours ago, his father's normal doctor of 25 years is traveling with the royal family, and the interim doctor needs payment; all in all asking me for 27 rials.

i said that i didn't know him well enough to lend him money.

one of those days i'll drop by his house (the one supposedly behind the farthest visible from our gates) to check up on his dad.

this is the number to report begging:

+968-247-94949"

What made me reel from reading this is that this is the exact story and individual who ripped off a very kindly Oman Air captain a few weeks ago.

This guy may be targeting ex-pats only as I think that he wouldn't get away with doing this to a local.

Maybe Boxster can shed some more light on where it took place etc, either by commenting here or by email.

Be careful!

Tables, Chairs and Foodcourts

Hello darlings! 

JetDriver has returned from the "dark place" - where computers and mobile phones are not allowed - nor are microwave ovens! :)

Nice to come back to the eclectic spread of blogs and rants - gives me an hour's entertainment on an otherwise mundane Thursday. 

National holidays eh? According to colleagues, our Omani staff got struck down with illness on Saturday and Sunday, and then a funeral in Salalah on Monday - terribly unfortunate for them. 

Anyway......

What the fuck is wrong with people who walk into Costas, Starbucks or wherever, sit down, take out the phone and open the paper and sit there......WITHOUT ORDERING SOMETHING?! 

And then look at you like you're mental when you ask if they are going to move, because you have actually paid to use the table.

Does this place want me to write "A Guidebook To Civilised Consumerism" ?

If you want to have the shopping malls and the bookstores and the boutiques; and you want the visitors and the tourist-money and the positive international press - you have to start learning how to behave properly. 

Here's the basics:

It's a queue - a line. Wait your fucking turn!

Folks. Pay attention. It's a 4x4, it's real and if you walk out in front of it, pretending not to see me in the car-park, it's going to hurt - really hurt! 

Gentlemen. You are going to get punched and it is going to happen sooner than you think. 

Tourism is on the up. 

More couples are visiting, ergo, you have a higher, almost imminent chance of having your teeth smashed in for leering. 

Also, most tourists are in better shape than you (even the girls), so that punch is going to have a lasting memory for you! Stop gawking!

(And just to add to this, boys: If you touch, you're in serious trouble. I mean it! 

To the guy who rubbed himself against my girlfriend in MCC last month......someday mate, she will see you again, and she will point, and I will put you in traction. You have my word.)

As for the person who stopped his Yukon at the entrance to Carrefour and waited for his wife and housemaid to come out with two trolleys and then proceed to load it all up, while the line of drivers behind you were going apoplectic - not cricket, old chap.

Hacking up your lungs at the table next to mine in the Foodcourt ..... just don't, ok? Don't.

Get your laptop, go to Google and look up "Common Courtesy" and "Manners" - and while you're at it....."Sexual Harrassment" and "Having your jaw wired".

End of rant. It's great to be back!

Attempted Child Abduction At Muscat Airport

kidnapThe UK Foreign Office has issued a new advisory on its site in relation to the attempted abduction of a child at the airport.

http://www.fco.gov.uk/en/travelling-and-living-overseas/travel-advice-by-country/middle-east-north-africa/oman

I have heard of a few incidents over the time that I have been here, about children getting a bit too much attention from males - especially around the beach at Shatti for some reason. 

Because this is such a great place as a rule, with not very high levels of crime, we all have a tendency to take our eye off the ball sometimes. 

It's funny how the world is different over here. Last week, while on a trip up into the Jebels, we were astonished to see a family from a village, pass us by in their jeep and then screech to a halt, while the back doors were opened and two young children were summarily ordered out to go and sell keyrings to us. 

A girl of around ten and what appeared to be her brother with her, who was a few years younger. 

Off sped the jeep and kids were left to fend for themselves. 

One wonders how many children get abducted here and who are never found? 

Contemplating it, and knowing how other things are covered up here, is scary.

Muscat Airport Closure?

Having just received my roster for the month of December, I see that the dates of the GCC conference have been flagged by a tiny asterisk. 

Now, this can normally mean a heads-up for things like flight delays and possible holding before arrivals or departures. 

However, rumours have been (pardon the pun) flying around the ops room that the Government has ordered the closure of Muscat Airport to all commercial flights during the 4 days of the GCC conference. 

I stress that at this time, THIS IS RUMOUR ONLY, however, I am hoping that Underground Dragon might be able to hear what the jungle drums are saying round at his place. 

If this is the case, and they are closing the airport - I get the feeling that it would be the death knell for Oman's tourism campaign. 

Over to UD for now...

Power Out

So, the power went out at 4am and everything is still off. Sigh.

Called up the power company - they have a phone that rings but is never answered. 

Apparently, if you translate "24 hour hotline" into local-speak it becomes "Blood-pressure building to the point of self-harm hotline."

But it always happens at the wrong time, doesn't it?

The night before would have been fine.

We were as poor as church mice. 

Sitting at home, watching the internet banking service ticking through the seconds to midnight and then bouncing up and down on the bed with glee as my salary popped in. (We all behave like that don't we?) 

So we celebrated with wild abandon, while the lights beamed away happily, as we lay there thinking of the magic of City Centre Day tomorrow. 

But now, I sit here in the glumness of the bedroom that the rep told us had "sunlight in the morning". It does. It's just that morning is gone by 7am as the only place that gets light here between then and 4pm is the roof. 

The AC is not working, nor are the fans or the water cooler or most importantly.....the fridge.

Yesterday's celebrations and trolley racing around Carrefour with the carelessness that all young lovers have, now seems like the torturous memories of a drunken night during the hangover of the next day. 

The cries of "Oh what did we DO?" 

Well, here's what we did...

There is an entire cow's worth of tenderloin and rib-eye now rotting away in the top of what used to be the freezer. 

Keeping it company is a month's supply of Chicken Nuggets, Hot Dogs, Beef Burgers, Mixed Veg, and of course, 8 litres of ice-cream which is now running down the outside of the fridge door in a gloppy lattice of pink, white, yellow and brown which Dali himself would have admired. 

The battery is running out on my laptop, so I will have to tear myself away from here, have a cold shower and, assuming that they have some, go and steal electricity from Starbucks, comforting myself with a fresh Cappuchino and a stodgy, soft and spongey Double Chocolate Muffin.

However, this being Oman and that being Starbucks, one can imagine the countless sighs of disappointment that I will have to make on my way there, when I get there, and all through the eating process of what will probably turn out to be bitter, overheated Arabica and a rock solid specimen of what might of been on the muffin front. 

Later my friends, for I must go and face my demons.

A Motoring Revelation!

There's a new kid on the block in the luxury mid-range sedan market!

Lots of hype and posters advertising it.

Close-ups of streamlined fairings, crystal-edged indicators, xenon headlamps and dual layer metallic paint.

The thought that brought a smirk to my face was the fact that the locals will be queueing up to buy a car named after the first book of the Bible!

Yes folks, the Hyundai Genesis has arrived at a showroom near you!

It's right here: www.hyundaigenesis.com

Ok, not the worst faux pas of the year but amusing none the less.

So many new cars on the market and now they are fast running out of names to call them.

But hey, some bright spark in Korea has realised that there are 66 humdinger names to pick from in the Good Book!

What is it about Korea and subliminal preaching?

One would think that they learned from the recent goings-on in Afghanistan and Iraq.

I was wondering if Hyundai were planning a whole series of "biblical" models?

The Hyundai Exodus or the Ecclesiastes Coupé, perhaps?

Could this be the answer to the shortage of car names?

Will others jump on the religious bandwagon?

Check out the new Fiat Ramadan - coming soon.......maybe!

Shatti Hamster Wheel

Looking in at Undercover Dragon's article about the boy racers....can anyone tell me what the attraction is for the locals to drive round and round for an hour in the small circle that is the car park at Starbucks down at Shatti?

Anyone? No?

It has the makings of a great place for people to sit and have a coffee and a chat and relax along the sea front.

However, it all gets messed up by the modified exhausts, the revving of engines and the thump of the chronically bad Raj or Arabic dance music coming out of souped up Daihatsu Serions and Toyota Corollas.

Five times around Shatti car park and then head up to Al Sarooj and block the roadabout at the Al Masa for two hours.

All I want is 2 litres of milk from Al Fair, but nope - the bastards have blocked off access there as well so it now takes an hour to get some low-fat action.

Then we have the rich kids in the Mustangs and the Corvettes with the arrogance that goes with having one, and lately, the dickheads on their Harleys who seem to think that deafening all and sundry is cool, and that chicks actually dig all this........they don't!

No one is impressed by the lumps of plastic that you have stuck on to the side of your car in an effort to make it more "Extreme" - no one that is, except for the other muppets like you that hang around in lawn chairs by the side of the road at Muscat Pharmacy and McDonalds. (What is that all about?) "Chillin' with my homies in ma Carrefour cheya mo-fo!"

And while I am on the subject of cars...

Locals (and I specify locals as I don't see expats doing this) - I don't care if you are only going to take five minutes and you think it's ok......blocking the exit from the Shatti car park with your Nissan Armada house on wheels so that you can use the ATM or go and shake hands and shoot the shit with your cousins outside Costa's is NOT OK!

Give it up!

Cleared For Takeoff....

Having been reading the highly informative and educational submissions from Undercover Dragon and the cutting edge wit of Suburban and others on blogspot, I have decided to dive headlong into the Muscat blogging community and say my piece from time to time.

This will more than likely be my usual spleen-venting that is normally done at home or on the drive back from work.

Have to thank my especially tolerant girlfriend who's ear gets bent more times than she really deserves!

Here we go....